Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Sidekick or Baby Mama?

I recently read the lastest edition of Haper's Bazarre. In it was an article with Savannah Brinson(the mother of LeBron James's children). There were a few things in the article that I found quite interesting.

One quote she had in the article was "I'm the mother of his children. I am not a baby mama. There's more to me than that." Hmmm really? For all of you that are single moms this is NOT directed toward you. I love marriage and family especially black marriages but when I see articles like this it burns me up. I feel like she's trying to rationalize her position in his life and it pisses me off. I don't think because you have a child you should marry the child's father because sometimes it just doesn't work like that. But to sit there and have two children by this man or any other man and be ok with just being his "sidekick" is not ok. Lebron isn't saying that he's going to ever marry her or that she is the one for me. In this article he states that she is his "sidekick." Arrruuu? Sidekick? Are you serious? The mother of his children is his "sidekick?" The thing that blows my mind is that she is ok with this. This is Lebron's statement "A person like myself needs a great sidekick and a person you can rely on no matter what the circumstances. And she is that, she's got my back and I love her for that." Once again I can't get past the sidekick part.

More and more black women are having children out of wedlock at a rate of nearly 70%. It makes no sense to continue doing this and have no intention on having a legal union. I know marriage IS NOT for everyone and I certainly don't expect women who have had a child from a man to just marry him because. This is focused to the ones who go out and have kids all willy nilly and NEVER having any intention to get married. I think women who do this are selling theirselves short. For those women who think that having a child will get the man to marry them are sadly mistaken too.

One part of the interview Savannah talks about being a role model to young women in her hometown of Akron. I don't get it. You were Lebron's highschool sweetheart who went on to have two children by him and will be paid for the rest of your life. She didn't go to college nor do anything else. I'm not knocking that she isn't nice(my hairdresser does her weaves and says she's the sweetest girl). But what are you showing these young women? To find a baller and have children and never get married and to be their "sidekick". STOP poppin' out babies to a man that doesn't think enough of you to give you a real status....WIFE!

What say you guys? Is being a sidekick better than a baby mama?


Not so Anonymous said...

Girl, when I was on vacay one of my friends and I got in a heated debate about this issue around mr. lebron.

I don't like the message these "messy" people send to their children by building a home together, having babies, and never "committing".

I could go on, but I won't...you did a good job of making the point.

Dee said...

I 1000% percent agree! I have been ranting about this as well. I hate to see the black family union being destroyed b/c women think its ok to birth madd babies for these dudes without greater commitment, and dudes think it's ok to have kids all over the place. Because the fact is, if dude is not married, it's very easy to up and leave the baby mama.

This issue is deeper than single parenthood, the overarching problem is the fact that black people do not marry anymore, with or without kids! Marriage is deemed for punks. I just don't understand why! SMH.

Anyhoo, great post. Maybe we're just old-fashioned.


Pretty background, btw.

Mizrepresent said...

The sad thing is she could possibly be setting herself up for the "goodbye" wave. Of course, she is the one he trusts the most and that should be vice versa. If he truly loves her and wants to enforce the family unit then he needs to put a ring on it...and yes Savannah, it's time to put that pressure on or walk away. Don't let the bright lights, the fine living fool ya...we come into this world alone, we go out alone. Your destiny is just that, YOURS. Sigh, i would hate to see what happens in the next year, but if Lebron is not man enough to do the right thing, then she needs to move on.

Tyrone said...

I would love for them to be married; however, marriage isn't for everyone. However, calling yourself a sidekick is a no-no. Denying yourself an education is a bad idea. What if he puts her out on the street/breaks up with her, what then?

ShellyShell said...

@Everyone I think it's a hot ass mess! She's not showing her sons the value of marriage.

@Tyrone He can put her on the street but she'll own the beyatch. The minute she had one kid she was set for LIFE! She'll be the primary caregiver and she'll get beaucoup $$$/month.

chele said...

Role model? It makes me sad to read things like this, because she probably actually believes that is a role model. Young women have got to think more of themselves. They have to realize that they can be and do so much more. Their goal in life should not be to have children with ball players and be on reality television.

12kyle said...

I feel where you're coming from Shell. However, I can't blame Savannah. The responsibility falls on Lebron. She can't marry him unless HE wants to get married. She can't do it alone. I don't think she deserves the heat either. Is she 'sposed to walk away from her high school love? We don't know what Lebron is telling her...or not telling her.

Lebron is 25 and has 2 kids. How many 25 year old men with kids do you know that are ready to RUSH down the aisle? Then add the fact that THIS 25 yr old man is worth 300 Million

suga said...

"A person like myself needs a great sidekick and a person you can rely on no matter what the circumstances. And she is that, she's got my back and I love her for that."

This just goes to show how simple minded people are. I understand his use of the word side kick because in a way, he could be saying that she is his best friend and partner, but hello! Isn't that basically what a wife SHOULD be? Go on and marry her. It sounds like the only thing they're missing are the rings, anyway.

One thing I will never understand: people will do everything that married couples do, but refuse to get married. What is the point?

Anonymous said...