I'm baaaaack fam! I know no one missed me...YET! I thought about abandoning this blog but thanks to Kyle over at 12Planet I'm going to keep on going!! I actually didn't mean to disappear for a week but it just worked out like that!
I've had a lot of extra time on my hands since me and the "beefcake" seperated so I've been going to the gym and hitting A LOT of happy hours. Happy hours are meant to last for a couple of hours right? Nope, not when I go. I went out Wednesday and got home at 3:45am and had to get up at 7:00...wtf?? Thursday dinner with an out of town friend I got home at 2:30am and woke up at 7:00am!We were able to leave work Friday at 3:00....yup you guessed it took my azz directly to happy hour and had my first cocktail by 3:45! Of course I went out for the remainder of the weekend and the earliest I got home was 1:30 and that was because we started drinking at 1:30pm.....I love NY but dammit I love my liver too! The poor thing is screaming "Set me free!"
I'm sure I wouldn't be doing all this going out if I was still with "Mr. Beefcake" I nicknamed him that because his body is LIKE THAT! I really miss this boy and some of our seperation is my fault and I'm woman enough to take my share of the blame. He still is the first person I speak to in the morning and the last person I speak to before I go to bed. If I'm out he always answers (even if it's late) to get my call that I made it home safely but for now we're just not a match. He has some attachment issues and he told me that until he deals with them he will never be a good boyfriend, husband or father. It's not about another woman but the woman before me cheated on him and when he was 11 his mother died suddenly so he never really got over the loss. He says he knows that I'm the one for him and that he wants to be with me but he has to get over the issues. He also stated that he understands that during this separation if I meet someone else that is the consequence he has to deal with. Man, I tell y'all he is the nicest,most sincere, considerate man I have ever dealt with. He extends himself to me, his family and friends and asks nothing in return. My dilemma is I know he didn't ask me to wait for him to work out his issues but I think that's what I'm. I've been on a couple of dates but seriously I think I went because I didn't feel like cooking when I got home....lmao! So,I'm sitting at the table looking a fool thinking would this dude just shut the f*ck up!! I get asked out at least once a week but I'm always like no thanks! Some of my "money hungry" friends are like "girl do you know what he does?" "He makes 6 figures a couple times over" "So" is my answer. Money does not make you happy it's who you're with! Mr. Beefcake is a middle school teacher and I'd take him over $300,000 any day! I'm so confused! When I started writing this post this isn't the direction I wanted it to take but ohh well!